Do You Have a Family Emergency Plan?
We all know that we need plans in place to be prepared for just about anything imaginable nowadays. Who knew we would ever need so much toilet paper? That aside, we as caregivers plan so much for our caree’s life and needs that often, we fail to put plans in place for ourselves. Without a plan, you can feel at the mercy of the moment. With a plan, you can manage almost any crisis more effectively.
It is not joyful to think of the negative, scary, or unknown “what-ifs” of life. But thinking ahead is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself and those around you. So, let’s talk about this.
We can start by listing categories, and each category may need its own plan.
Common Issues Include:
Deadlines at work cause scheduling and time issues
Weather (depending on where you live)
Travel
Help cancels at the last minute
You (or a family member) have a hospitalization
A flu or virus
Delays in getting to your caree
It’s time for you to take a break
First, break each category down into “My Plan When _______,” and then list a) when this may happen; b) what we will do when it happens; or c) what we have available when it may happen. It’s a fluid plan, but it’s there and can help in an emergency when we may not be able to think or act as we wish.
For example, let’s say that you are the primary caregiver for your mother, who still lives in her own home. You come down with a horrible flu, causing you to stay in bed for several days. What backup plan do you have for your mother to continue receiving her medicine, groceries, or help with her shower? If she lives with you, this same event may need a different approach.
What if you yourself needed emergency hospitalization? Have you created your own power of attorney and written out your wishes for medical directives? Have you told anyone what you want? Do you have an advocate who can help with things such as insurance, passwords (for access to your medical directives), and who you wish to have contacted and/or notified (or not)? Do each of these people get separate information about what’s happening, or the same information?
The amount of information and decisions to consider can be overwhelming, but every worry can have a plan to the best of our abilities. We can start by identifying our own needs and wishes, and then deciding how to communicate them to our family. This step may also need a plan. Can we call some people? Do others need to be spoken with in person, or will an email suffice? Can we delegate the tasks needing to be done for ourselves to a neighbor or friend, so we can continue to meet the needs of our caree, pets, and family directly?
Once plans are made, it’s vital to make hard copies of the information and communicate where that information can be found. This may include: a list or outline of the daily activities you do for your caree; medicines and medical information; what and when they eat; dietary issues; your caree’s routine; and any special information you have that can help someone who is not used to doing what you do day in and day out. Consider things as simple as what may be a trigger or something to watch out for, or how to help calm your caree. Documenting everything that you do so naturally is a tremendous help for the ones stepping in to make a difficult situation smoother for you and your loved ones.
We hope that we will never need to use the backup plans we make, but life happens and there are no guarantees. Creating your basic plan is a start. Remember: you can always update, change, or add to your plans. Once you have plans in place, it’s a good idea to revisit them yearly or every six months (depending on how the situation changes). Reaching out to an Elder Law Attorney or Financial Planner may provide insight to help you know where you stand and what steps to plan for legally as progressed care needs change. It’s a lot to think through and I’m here to help.
